Ok, maybe it isn’t that bad. But actually, I wouldn’t know since I've never had one. It’s true, and I realise how annoying I sound if you are sat there reading it with a smashing headache, I’m just so great.
But what is a hangover, and why does that annoying friend who drinks just as much as you never get a hangover? It’s not magic, or medicine, and for those of those who know me outside of Quantam Scientist, it isn’t the essence of Chinese DNA either.
As soon as you begin drinking your pint of Cider (or if you are hard like me, your tray of Tequilas), the effects of the ingredients reach your brain via your bloodstream. Although hard to believe, this happens in less than 2 minutes due to the high relative permeability of nearly every cell membrane in the body to ethanol. Incredible. There in the brain, there are receptors called GABA-A also known by their other name Relax Receptors (© Alex Tam) which ethanol binds to by positive allosteric modulation. Now this just means that it increases the activity of the Relax Receptor when ethanol binds to it and the crucial point about this receptor is that when it is made more active it suppresses several elements of the human consciousness such as the fear of social situations. Hey presto, you have a good night ahead.
The concentration of alcohol in the central nervous system also starts to get the brain's bodily functions quite confused. Normalement, an area of the brain called the hypothalamus secretes a cheeky little hormone called Anti-Diuretic Hormone or Vasopressin which stops you going for a wee wee when water supplies are running out. However, the confused brain, much like his owner, doesn't show the capacity to listen to the words of the sensible hypothalamus and of course going for a wee occurs much more often. Banter. On top of this, you are probably sweating like beast on the dance floor and burning plenty of calories, of which both require water. As a result of all these things, you lose more water than you drink and the body becomes dehydrated due to lack of water.
Beginning to sound familiar? This is where hangover begins. Since water, H20, is required for most biochemical reactions, negative effects begin to ensue. Headache, nausea, lethargy are the official symptoms given by the NHS of dehydration and all of them kindly contribute to the woes of hangover. In spite of dehydration, the reserve of body water stored within the tissues means the the body can resist most of the symptoms for a couple of hours, draining at it as much as it can. It is because of this that hangover is only felt in the morning, when the reserve of water has run out. The liver is responsible for converting the vodka-sourced ethanol into less harmful substances and needs water to perform the detoxification, so when the reserves of water have passed their threshold, it begins to remove it from other parts of the body, starting with the brain.
Headache:
Water is removed from the brain and it shrinks, pulling away from the outside of the skull. This is the banging headache experienced during hangover.
Lethargy:
The less water that is about, the less respiration can happen. Respiration is needed to make ATP, which is the energy dollar used throughout the body. Less water, less energy, more tired. Disphoria is also felt, which is the opposite of Euphoria. Self-expalanatory.
Nausea:
Ethanol is an irritant, which means it annoys the stomach lining by saying that it is has never had a hangover because it is Chinese. As a result, you feel sick and nauseous.
Of course, the symptoms of hang over get progressively worse depending on which drinks you have and how good you felt the night before. Shots tend to have a higher alcohol concentration, with Tequila being right up there and Sourz being one of the lowest, and can get you wobbling and dribbling in as little as 5 minutes. They are also fantastic for dehydration and thus hangover. On the other-hand, pints of pub-glassed beverages are far lower substance than shots and contain more water so will get you there slower and steadily. Besides the liver of McLovin, most livers can handle a pint of beer without any problem at all.
So why is it that I, and 20-30% of all drinkers do not get hangover? It is simply because we are more hydrated, and the more hydrated you are, the less hungover you shall be. Water is also renowned for it's beauty properties as evidenced in myself.
See the video for explanation and banter from Mr James May, who really should be knighted.
I also just wanted to say well done to every A-level student of 2011, well done for all your hard effort and I hope it all pays off in August. In spite of this article, I have been hammered every other day since my last exam.
